“Trash The Dress” is this for you?

trashthedress 150x150 Trash The Dress is this for you?
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Hours and hours of searching for that perfect wedding dress before the big day making sure you look perfect.  The reception has ended and it’s time to put your dress back in the box.  Sounds like a typical scenario right?

Well, more and more brides are choosing not to preserve their wedding gown but to “trash it” instead.  So, after paying hundreds or possibly thousands of dollars, you have decided to destroy your wedding dress.  To some this may be an absurd idea but this is a huge and growing trend.  Are you really going to pass the dress on to your daughter 25 years from now when she will probably want to buy her own?  Will you ever open the box once you preserve it and will it just collect dust?  So many brides have decided to forgo the tradition of saving their dress and have fun with it instead.  How you may ask? Jumping into the pool, playing on the beach, rolling around in mud , spraying paint all over each other, and all of this with a photographer taking some unique shots.  Can you imagine the fun and conversations that will accompany these pictures.

If these ideas are just not for you then why not consider a few wonderful ways to donate your wedding dress.  One of my favourite ideas is to donate your dress to a charitable organization such as the Brides against Breast Cancer, Military Brides or others who may be less fortunate to afford one.  Many sites such as The Bride’s Project, Donate My Wedding Dress, and Making Memories Breast Cancer Foundation offer some wonderful ideas and programs. Just knowing that YOU put a smile on someone’s face by helping out a less fortunate person can be more satisfaction than you’d imagine. 

Whether you choose to trash, preserve, sell or donate your wedding dress it will never be forgotten and is a symbol of vows you made on your wedding day.

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Do Brides Have The Right to Be Demanding?

936114 615353418476571 927168918 n 150x150 Do Brides Have The Right to Be Demanding?When your fiance asks you for your hand in marriage it is a very exciting time, but for some, an anxious experience.  One of the biggest days of your life is actually going to happen and your mind will be going a hundred miles a minute about wedding planning.

Figuring out the season, type of theme, invite list, menu, type of wedding, who the bridesmaids will be, can become overwhelming for almost any bride.  Unfortunately, the brunt of this may be directed towards family, friends, fiance and your wedding vendors.

Wedding vendors are very patient individuals and know how important the bride’s day is.  When we first meet with a bride (speaking from experience) you can pretty well pinpoint her personality and what’s in store for you.  Is she very passive and will agree to anything, is she indecisive and changes her mind on a regular basis or perhaps bold, obnoxious and knows exactly what she wants and is not afraid to tell you.

No matter what type of personality they may have, weddings can bring the worst out in many of us but does this allow you to be mean and demanding to your vendors?  Are t.v. reality shows like bridezilla’s and celebrity weddings making the average bride crazy?

As vendors we must remember what the bride is going through not only with the planning stages but issues or problems may be happening at home we are unaware of.  After doing thousands of weddings it seems so easy for vendors to say “the table is just fine in this corner” but one thing you need to remember is ” this is their wedding day and they want everything perfect.  As vendors we have done thousands of weddings so it is like second nature to us.

Brides actually need more guidance and help that you think.  The best advice I can give is to listen, help, be accommodating and try your best to help with their vision.  Sure, some brides are going to get your blood boiling a little but you just need to remember to step back and take a deep breath.   There is a light at the end of the tunnel and when all is said and done you receive that beautiful gift or thank you note which made the entire process worth it.

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Cut Down Your Wedding List

Creating your guest list is an important MUST to determine your budget and size that fits in your venue.  Between your parents, families, close friends and co-workers it will add up quicker than you think.  Remember, the more guests you have the higher the cost becomes.  How do you go about cutting the list?

First create an A and B list.  The A list is your immediate family and close friends that must be invited.  From there, start your B list.  The B list would be acquaintances, old friends of your parents, co-workers, or there may be some family members that you may not have seen for years or friends of your parents that you may not even know. You need to ask yourself, are these people important to have at my wedding? Don’t invite any children unless they are from your immediate family and you don’t have to invite each single person to bring a date unless you know they are in a relationship.  It is not necessary to invite all of your co-workers either.  They will know by your discussions at work that it is a smaller wedding with family.   Actually, many times your co-workers get a gift anyways and have a get together outside of work with you.

Once your lists are finalized, you and your fiancé need to sit down and start looking at who should be moved from the B to A list.   Try to include some discussions with both sets of parents as well but be prepared for some disagreements from them (unless they are paying the bill of course) at which time you may not have much say.  Many receptions are booked one year in advance so allow a couple empty seats just in case you have forgotten someone along the way.

It is an honor to receive a wedding invitation but if someone does not make “the list” you should not feel guilty.   You created a budget and want to do your best to stick to it.  Some brides ask me if it’s okay to invite guests to the ceremony and not the reception.  My answer to this would be no.  If one is good enough to be invited to the ceremony they should be good enough to attend the reception.  Some friends will decide on their own to show up to the ceremony knowing that they are not invited to the reception but that is by their own choice.

It is your wedding day and when you are greeting your guest and looking around the room when saying your speech you should be smiling at all the guests that are the closest to you and played an important part of your lives.




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IJSY Guest Blog: Wedding Band Vs DJ – How Do You Decide?

Many couples planning a wedding face the same dilemma – wedding band or DJ?  If you and your fiancé are struggling with this decision, it’s likely that your family and friends have strong opinions on who you should choose.  Here are some things to consider when making your decision.

Wedding Band 

As everyone knows, there’s nothing like hearing live music. Anyone who has ever been to a concert or heard live music performed knows it creates a certain energy in the air.  It’s exciting and thrilling and the quality of live music cannot be matched.  It truly sets the tone of the evening.  This is especially true if you’re incorporating a theme in your wedding.  A retro glam wedding wouldn’t be the same without a swing band.  A Scottish couple celebrating their heritage throughout their entire wedding needs a Scottish Wedding Band to play traditional Ceilidh music.  An orchestra would be more appropriate for a large formal wedding.  A DJ just wouldn’t be the same in these instances.

There are a few drawbacks to hiring wedding bands.  Some bands aren’t very versatile.  They are able to perform one genre of music and that’s it.  They may not be able to accommodate requests from your guests, or perform popular wedding dance music.  Some people just don’t enjoy hearing bands cover their favorite music.  This is especially true for your first dance.  If you and your fiancé have a special meaningful song that you want played for your first dance, will it be the same hearing someone other than the original artist perform it?   You should also be aware that wedding bands will have to take breaks during sets.  You’ll need to find out how your band handles their breaks.  Is there just dead air, or do they play recorded music for the guests?

The biggest drawback to hiring a live wedding band is the cost.  Some bands can be very expensive, depending on how large they are, how many members they have and how long you ask them to play.  However, many wedding bands are becoming more competitive with their pricing, so do your research.


For some couples, a DJ is clearly the way to go.  A DJ usually has access to thousands upon thousands of songs.  You can hear your favorite songs performed by the original artists.  Also, DJ’s will be able to take requests from your guests.  A good DJ will have the popular music that your friends love, the standard wedding dance music everyone looks forward to hearing, and oldies but goodies that your older guests can enjoy.

DJ’s are usually less expensive than hiring a live band.  But you do need to be wary of DJ’s who can’t get the crowd excited.  A bad DJ has the potential to ruin your wedding reception.  Playing obscure songs, making rude or unusual comments, not taking requests can all throw a huge damper on your wedding reception.

Whatever you decide, you should definitely be sure to check out the band or DJ in action.  Ask if you can pop in when they are working at another wedding.  Check to see if the dance floor is full and watch to see how they are interacting with guests.  The DJ or bandleader typically acts as the emcee during the wedding reception.  Make sure he or she has a good personality and relates well to the guest and staff.

The most important thing to remember is that it’s your wedding.  While it’s important to make your guests happy, you deserve to choose the entertainment that will make you and your new spouse happy, too.  After all, you only get to do this once, so make it count.  Throw a party that you’ll remember for the rest of your lives!

Yvone Kon is a former event coordinator and wedding consultant.  Now she’s a freelance writer, blogger and mom.  She frequently writes about weddings, wedding planning and wedding fashion.  She is the author of the blog EventSpiration, providing inspiration and ideas for weddings, parties and holidays.  For information regarding freelance writing projects, please contact her via her blog.

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